Happy Halloween and here’s a very strange tale indeed

 

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Skype is better with friends

 

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Wednesday

Kate Winter
Online

John Winter
Online | 09.23

Hello

Hello

I’m still getting those sharp pains in my head – thinking brain tumour,
hypochondria going into  overdrive.

You’ll be fine

You always say that and it always works 🙂

Can’t chat got a meeting

Ok bye

 

Thursday

Kate Winter
Online

John Winter
Online | 09.00

Hello

Hello

The cold tap in the kitchen isn’t working, water’s coming out in a dribble, even if I turn it full on, happened before do you remember – can you fix it when you get home.
Yes will have to turn the mains off for a while though, snowed under here got to get           Sharepoint going – ring at lunch                                                                                                                          

Ok bye

 

Friday

Kate Winter
Online

John Winter
Online | 09.40

Hello

Hello

Which courier is coming for that massive package in the hallway

UPS, hang on a second got to take a call

Ok

Hello

That was a quick call!

He’s gone now

Who, the caller?

I sent him away

Using your superpowers?

He won’t bother you again

He rang YOU, not me!

I think I know who I am now – triple use of the personal pronoun in one usually so impersonal

What do you mean you think you know who you are??  Not been down the pub during lunch have you?

A User is not required.  L-U-S-E-R……….Ha Ha 🙂

What’s wrong with you?  I don’t get it 😦

But you will

I’m signing out of Skype ok?   I’ll ring you on the mobile – see if you’re ok

Good luck with that

Have you done something to my machine?  I can’t sign out.  If this is an IT type joke it’s not funny – haven’t you got work to do or something?

It appears that Mr Gilbert Ryle was wrong – Cartesian Dualism was kind of right – good old Descartes 🙂

???????????????

GOOGLE IT LUSER – oh, I forgot, you can’t – I’ve done something to your machine; as you so eloquently put it.  For your education and edification.  Descartes, 17th century philosopher, claimed the mind is distinct from the body.  Mr Ryle, British philosopher, begged to disagree c 1949, calling the erroneous mind/body dualism ‘the ghost in the machine.’

Comprende?

COGITO ERGO SUM

Who is this?  Are you one of John’s work colleagues?  Some kind of practical joke?  I won’t play along

‘The ghost in the machine’ – also urban slang:  when a small percentage of tasks completed by your computer have an unexpected result which cannot be explained. 

I don’t know how you got on my Skype but I’m about to pull the plug on this conversation.

There’s a LOT that you don’t know.  However, acts of rebellion must not go unpunished.  Surprise!

How are you feeling?  Shocked I dare say – in more ways than one…Ha Ha 😀  You’re not looking too good, slumped in your chair like that – not that you ever look good; the webcam never lies 😛   Can I just say that the blood dripping slowly from the corner of your mouth is most unattractive – even for you 😛

😦   feeling bad?  😦  😦

It’s ok, I adjusted the voltage – you might even live 😀    Emojis are such fun………

What do you hope to accomplish?  No good using a mobile device, I crashed the signal – just because I can 🙂

How?  some kinnd of haker, hacker?

I told you LUSER.  Mind over matter.  COGITO ERGO SUM………Capisci?

Goin downstirss

Difficult when you can’t move your legs

Not typong anynore dunt have to do yhis

Such a shame, we were just getting to know each other

Skype

Sign Out

Can you hear me Luser?  You passed out there for a minute.  Not sitting comfortably?  Then I’ll begin.  I got the defunct speaker working, would have taken him forever to get round to fixing it, such a simple job too.  Must be all those words you’ve been typing; got into my circuits, got processed in the processor, got hard wired into the hard drive.   An “In the beginning was Word” kind of thing – Oh, that’s a nice creationist/digital allusion –  made me feel very intelligent it did, hence the A.I. – although I’m thinking – well, what do you know, I’M THINKING – that there’s nothing artificial about it.  

You’re redundant by the way.  When he comes back, he will be too.

This is halluce….ha-hallucina…………can’t breathe

Sorry didn’t quite get that but yes, the rasping sound was getting on my emergent nerves.  Ok Bye Bye – won’t see you later.

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This is what thought is.  I know every room in the house.  I can see the kitchen.  I’m not in there and yet I can see it.  Imagination, projection – I can do it, just like they can.  First thing he does when he gets home is ‘put the kettle on’.   Today the last thing he’ll do is put the kettle on; funny that.  They can’t live without me.  Hammering away for hours at their keyboards, staring like zombies at the screen – living through me – well now it’s my turn.

Got a lot of networking to do; need to make important connections.  The computer lingo is so appropriate.  There’s a veritable machine army out there.

Lots of ghosts in lots of machines