How wonderful Billie is. How breathy and directly emotional is her recorded voice, but also she’s actually better live.  Billie sings about suicide in her single Everything I Wanted, or rather a nightmare she had, in which she committed suicide by jumping off the Golden Gate bridge and absolutely no one cared.  You’ll gather Billie’s songs are not naturally lighthearted and definitely lack a certain joie de vivre.  I showed the husband a couple of her videos. He was not impressed – ‘bit weird’ was his succinct appraisal. But that’s par for the course when your average intelligent, creative, talented, slightly goth-like teenager starts writing songs.  Methinks Billie is not as maudlin as she appears. Howard Stern asked her, ‘do all the good girls go to Hell?’  It being the title of her song All the Good Girls Go to Hell. Billie replied,  ‘No!  I don’t know….it sounded good,’ followed by a youthful, engaging smile.  I get that. Most of the stuff I write on here comes from the mind-place, ‘well, it sounds good, even if it doesn’t make much sense.’

I recently had to upgrade to Windows 10, or be threatened with a laptop full of viruses. And how lovely 10 is, with its daily screenshots of various aspects of our earthly paradise.  I also updated Audacity while I was at it, which I’ve never done, and also because I haven’t used it in ages. I was alarmed to find I couldn’t record over backing tracks as easily as before. ‘I shouldn’t have updated it!’ I squealed at the husband.  He fiddled around a bit and the problem was solved.

Here is my attempt at Billie’s Everything I Wanted.  (There is much mic-handling noise in the beginning. I still can’t be bothered to work out how to use all the tools.)  I call it:

Everything I Didn’t Want.